To Know You Is To Hate You
by laneyWOW
Summary: Draco Malfoy is a vile git who doesn't know when to shut his mouth for the greater good. He's insufferable, infuriating, and demeaning. He's got another thing coming if he thinks I'll comply with his mind games. You see, I have a game of my own.


**To Know You Is To Hate You**

**Chapter One**

**Wants  
**

_No one loves you and you know it  
Don't pretend that you enjoy it and you don't care  
'Cause now I wouldn't lie or tell you all the things you want to hear_

There is a time in one's life when they reach the point of no return. A time in which the past cannot be taken back by a simple 'I'm sorry'. A time in which any strengths are forgotten, only to be replaced with fear and loathing.

There is also a time in one's life when light will pierce through the darkness. A time when good conquers evil. A time when flowers bloom and hippogriffs graze in the moonlight. The end of the war brought upon this time.

Exactly three years ago today, Harry Potter defeated the Dark Lord. In the time since, the Ministry of Magic has been completely remodeled, Hogwarts has been returned to its former glory, and the wizarding population has all pitched in to make the world a better place.

Sound perfect? Allow me to add that _also_ in the past three years, my father has been thrown into Azkaban, my mother has basically turned into a hermit, and my sister has become engaged to an insufferable prat.

Speaking of, today I am supposed to be attending an engagement ball. Oh yes, 'Come let us celebrate the coming together of two of the most renowned pureblood clans of the generation.' On the bright side, my mother has come out of her bedroom today. I believe she's even going to let her house elf wash her hair.

These times are still hard. Regaining status in the wizarding world was tough. Especially when the fate of your family name resides in the hands of a sixteen year old student. Daphne helped, of course. In fact, she probably would not be marrying Graham Montague in four months time if she weren't trying to help.

Graham is two years her senior, working under the head of the Department of Magical Transportation. He and Daphne met at a dinner party at the Parkinson Estate. He became infatuated with her immediately, taking means into his own hands in deciding to formally court her.

You see, the Montague's stayed neutral during the war. They minded their own business and kept rank within the Ministry. Daphne would have been a fool if she didn't accept his proposal. In all actuality, she fell in love with the git. She didn't intend to; it just happened, though I certainly did not approve. Grey robes, mousy hair, and a monotone voice was Graham Montague in a nutshell. He lacked the one thing needed in a man; passion.

What is love anyway? My definition was certainly not the same as my sisters. She tolerated Montague's monotonous routines. She came to admire his quiet disposition, his lack of goals. What could be more perfect for her? They were two of a kind. As it is, Daphne was never one for leadership. 'Fit into the shadows' was her motto. I suppose that's why she took to Parkinson so well.

As for me, I returned to Hogwarts for my last two years. How could I not? I _liked_ school. I received top marks on my N.E.W.T.s, and received an offer from St. Mungo's to start training as a specialized antidote potioneer, which leads me to the present.

I accepted, of course. After only a year I've gained extensive knowledge of poisons and their antidotes. It also helps that I'm being paid 8 galleons per hour. With the money that I make now, I could be completely independent of my family and everything that goes along with it. But then there was my mother.

Lucinda Greengrass was never a woman of many words. These days, she didn't even step outside of her bedroom. Wounded from the war, Lucinda refused all magical healing. She had been a Death Eater, along with my father. She confessed this to the Ministry, but they had ruled against sending her to Azkaban. When the Dark Lord fell, she was able to realize the damage that had been done. Her life goal is to repay her dept to society by refusing medical help, claiming that the witches and wizards who fought against the Dark Lord were the only ones worthy of magic. The Department of Magical Law Enforcement deemed her self-punishment unnecessary, but kept her out of Azkaban because of it.

I suppose this should make me happy, seeing as without her free, I would have been at the mercy of Daphne for my remainder at Hogwarts, but it did not. My mother thought herself the lowest scum on the planet. Her own daughters couldn't even coax her out of the confines of our estate to see the sunlight. Maybe in prison she would have kept her sanity. At least my father would have been there as well.

Seeing as there were no more dementors around, Azkaban wasn't as bad as it had been. Don't get me wrong, it is still _bad_. Countless charms and guards are working against the inhabitants to insure their captivity. That alone would drive the normal person to the brink of insanity. But this constant feeling of having to watch over someone who is supposed to be strong and smart is a large part of why I have to _get out_.

Cold and heartless it may be, but I should not have to deal with this. I just got out of Hogwarts; I'm in the prime of my life. I should have had a huge graduation ball like my mother and grandmother before her. Daphne never wanted such things. Or rather, she never spoke up about wanting them. Not that she finished school, that is. She, along with so many others never went back. With the Greengrass dowry and Montague as her suitor, who needed N.E.W.T.s anyway?

Honestly, I'm lying to myself. I didn't want such things then and I don't want them now. I just want my freedom. I want Daphne to take care of mother. I want to pursue larger professions than that of St. Mungo's. I want…

"Astoria, you're late!" My sister's head floated in my fireplace disrupting my train of thought. "The ball is in less than two hours and you've yet to pick up your gown!"

"Honestly, Daphne, I've plenty of time. If you're so concerned with keeping appearances, then why don't you come see that mother remembers to eat today? Oh, wait! That would assume that you cared for anyone but yourself." I smirked at her shocked expression. This had gone on long enough.

"Astoria Greengrass, you take that back at once." I whipped around so quickly that I became tangled in my robes.

There stood Lucinda Greengrass, tall and statuesque as ever, before the war. Her hair was secured in a tight bun at the base of her neck, powder blue gown billowing out around her. I masked my shock well, or at least enough to detect no sign of it through my mother's eyes.

"Astoria, I've had Maisy pick up your gown for the evening. You will be ready in one hour. Daphne, dear, I'm terribly sorry for not congratulating you earlier. Please send my regards to Mrs. Montague for not being . . . sufficient in my hosting skills. I'll ask you to question her about anything I can do to help out tonight. You will come home before the ball to show me your engagement ring? Splendid."

Daphne looked like a fish, opening and closing her mouth at her mother's new demeanor. I'm sure I would have looked somewhat the same, if I hadn't many years training in concealing my true feelings.

Mrs. Greengrass turned on her heal and swept from the room as Daphne's head disappeared. What happened to cause this change in my mother? Surely not whim? I suddenly heard a small crack as Maisy, my personal house elf, appeared.

"Maisy has gots Lady Astoria's robes for the night's festivities, ma'am" the elf recited as she quickly laid the silver material on my bed.

"Maisy, haven't we been working on your grammar?"

"Maisy is terribly sorry, miss, for she has forgotten most of what Miss Astoria taught her over breakfast" said the elf. I looked down at her and smiled.

"It's alright, but we'll keep working on it, as long as you don't mind." I added the last bit, reminding myself of the video I had recently watched about the mistreatment of house elves.

"Lady Astoria is too good to little old Maisy, for Maisy has seen with her own eyes what other elves must endure. She is blessed to have such a great mistress!" With these final words, the elf disappeared with another crack.

I stumbled over to my bed, moving the draping as I sat. I pulled my gown from its hangings and began to undress, my brown curls falling from their previous restraint. I stepped into the gown, pulling it up as far as I could and grabbed my wand. I muttered a simple lacing charm, then accessorized. The gloves and headdress were my own addition. I thought it looked somewhat more elegant.

Peering at my reflection in the mirror, I noticed how much of a difference _trying_ made. I suppose I was sort of beautiful. I pinned my hair in a low bun to the side, achieving the look I wanted. Then I positioned the netted headdress. This piece wasn't necessarily appropriate, but I loved the extravagant. This was a ball, after all.

Satisfied as appearances go, I descended the stairs to the foyer. My mother stood stock still, staring out of the window.

"Mother?" It was like she didn't even hear me. Her eyes were glazed over, in a way, as if not really seeing whatever she was looking at. Suddenly, sharp as a whip, she turned.

"Oh, good. Come, darling. The time is near, and I wish to arrive somewhat early."

I nodded in agreement, willing her eyes to glaze over once more. It was too strange, I suppose, to see her like this after nearly three years of deep depression. Was this too good to be true, her sudden snap back into reality? I couldn't be sure. I certainly didn't want her collapsing in sobs in the middle of dancing! The embarrassment would further her depression.

With one last look at my mother, I arranged my dress and apparated to the Montague Mansion.

* * *

The estate was large, but inviting. There was no gothic feel to this mansion, as opposed to her own, with its spires and wrought-iron gate surrounding the premises. A second later, my mother appeared next to me, hauntingly beautiful.

Together we walked past the glamoured gate, onto the grounds. Komodo dragons skulked in the bushes, just waiting for a small pet to wander from his or her owner. I visibly shivered, reminded of the time when a jackal took off with my kitten. My eyes narrowed at the uncaring beasts. I stumbled over a crack in the pavement, bringing me back to reality.

This is it; my first ball as a woman of age. This meant that I could sit with whomever I pleased, dance with whomever, leave whenever! I will no longer be thought of as 'Little Astoria Greengrass' or 'Daphne's little sister' or even 'Hey, kid!'. I am my own person and I shall show off tonight.

Damn Daphne to hell if she expects me to help cater to her every need, or the needs of her guests. Here tonight I was on a mission. I want to be seen by all and none. I want to capture the hearts of hundreds and one. This was _my _night to secure _my_ future.

* * *

"Miss Greengrass." I distantly heard my surname pronounced amidst the crows of guests flooding the ballroom of Montague Mansion. I turned, expecting to see an old acquaintance.

"Theodore" I said his name like silk, allowing my eyelashes to flutter slightly. Theodore Nott looked taken aback at the sight in front of him.

"I congratulate you on the news of your sister's engagement" he said, gazing into my eyes. His deep charcoal dress robes were fitting, his hair was neatly slicked back. I allowed my gaze to wander noticeably, before smirking.

"Yes, isn't it swell?" I paused, letting my eyes travel one last time, "You seem to have made quite the life for yourself, Theodore. Do tell me how work is. I heard about that promotion at Gringotts. It was all over The Prophet."

He smirked as well, as he spoke about his large promotion. I listened with interest, eyes scanning the room for any other possible candidates. If he doesn't show any more interest, I better be prepared to elect another.

"Miss Greengrass?" I turned my head back to him, smile firmly in place.

"Yes, Mr. Nott?"

"Care for a dance?"

_Let the games begin._

_

* * *

_

**A/N Yes, this is extremely short, but it was a natural place to stop it. I appreciate praise/criticism/comments. I hope my depiction of Astoria comes off original. Anyway, I plan on posting whenever I can. I hope to form a schedule, eventually. That would force me to write :) I tend to want to abandon my creations if I don't get much feedback. Let me know if you find anything undeniably wrong with this chapter. REVIEW!**_  
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